This game sucks! Part 2: What To Do When Nothing Changes.

Yesterday I discussed how to talk to your GM about problems with their game. If you followed my advice you probably pulled them aside and had a meaningful conversation about your concerns. Assuming you presented your case well and made it clear that you were serious, your GM probably seemed receptive to your problems. You discussed what made their game good and what you wanted or were willing to participate in. Then you waited, showing up to each session, looking for the change you had discussed. You didn’t push the issue, allowing them space to rap up current loose ends or work in the story elements you were looking for. Then….

Nothing happened.

Despite your conversation and your GM’s promises to make some changes, nothing changed. They continued forcing your face character through endless trials of blood, or persisted in plumbing the depths of depravity and darkness in their plotting. Maybe it even got worse, if their idea of solving the problem to bring everything to a dragged out conclusive ending.

Why are they doing this to me?

• Your GM wants to wrap up story threads or plots, and it is taking longer than they expected. They planned to have everything onto the new track within a few sessions but the actions of other characters or in game diversions are dragging it out longer than expected.
• Your GM is misguided, and thought that when you asked for things to change you meant “eventually” or “sometime this year”. What I mean by this is that they did not understand how much the problems were bothering you and took your one-on-one with them as game mastering advice, not a request for immediate change.
• Your GM tried to address your concerns, but after a short period of time fell back into bad habits.
• The other players really like the direction the story is headed or the rules changes.
• You are the odd man out and the GM does not really want to change the game in the way you desire.
• While they listened to you and pretended to agree to your proposals, your GM has no intention of changing their ways. They hope the whole thing will blow over if they just keep on doing what they were doing or that they will force you to leave (Unlikely but possible).

So, what now?

Regardless of how you feel, your GM has probably tried to address the problem. Pay attention and take note of positive changes. If a few sessions have passed and the problem remains, your only option is to talk to them again. Take note of the changes they have made and be prepared to explain why they are not sufficient. Once you are ready, pull your GM aside and explain that there is still a problem. Make it clear that you have seen the changes they have made and you appreciate them, but that there is still further to go. At this point your next actions are determined entirely by how they respond. They will either agree to work with you further, or make it clear that they will be inflexible. If the latter is the case, your only options are to suck it up or walk away. If they agree to work with you, try to set a time by which the changes will have been made. This will give them some room to work, but still hold them accountable.

And when that doesn’t work?

The first thing to do is talk to the other players. Do they share your concerns, or are you the only one with a problem? If so, you may want to consider finding or starting a different game. As I mentioned yesterday, sometimes your desires and those of your group will be so wildly different that this is the only option. If you choose to leave the game for a while, do it gracefully. Most people will understand and respect your decision if your reasons are clearly defined. Remember that this is everyone’s game, not just yours.

But the other players don’t like it either.

In this case an intervention may be required. If none of the players like the direction of the game it probably won’t be long until it falls apart. The best thing to do is discuss as a group what your problems are and what solution you would like to see. The problem with this approach is that when an entire group tells their GM they don’t like his game, feelings will be hurt. You run a strong risk of loosing them as a GM, and only a marginally smaller risk of loosing them as a friend.

Try to figure out a way to break it to them gently, and accentuate the positive. In most cases the problem will either be the story or the execution, not both. Try to focus on one or the other when you confront them. Make sure they understand that your problem is not with them but with the game, and that you still want to have them run a game, just not this game, or not this way. With any luck they will accept your concerns in a mature manner, and everyone’s experience will improve.

Have you had a situation where your GM was doing things you weren’t comfortable with? How did you deal with it?